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Discovering My Mission

November 7, 2017

From a young age, I always wanted to stand out. In everything I did, whether

that be dancing, acting, writing, or what have you, I always wanted to be the very

best. I never thought that my tendency to strive towards perfection would lead me

to starving myself to skin and bones. I never could have imagined that my quest to

be seen and heard would cause me to wind up wasting away in a hospital bed

with mandatory daily weigh-ins. When I was sixteen, I was diagnosed with Anorexia. The word had seemed foreign to me at the time. How could I be Anorexic? I’d heard of the illness before, but I never thought it could or would happen to me. I had always been small, never thought I was overweight, and didn’t “hate” my body…weren’t those the signs of someone who had an Eating Disorder? At least, that’s how it was taught to me in school and portrayed by the media. I just didn’t think I fit the description. Throughout my time in Outpatient and Inpatient treatment, I met many others struggling with the same disorder. These girls were of all different backgrounds, shapes and sizes, and walks of life. I quickly realized that there was no one face to this mental illness. I was worried I would be an outcast, that I would sit

there in treatment and not feel like I could relate to anything anyone was talking about. I was different, right? And yes, maybe that was true; we all were different, but we all were the

same. Regardless of our backgrounds, we had common fears, desires, tendencies,

and coping mechanisms. In treatment and after (in my own outside recovery), I

learned all of the many reasons why I developed an Eating Disorder. These issues

were deep-seated and, as I began to speak out about it in hopes of spreading awareness, I

realized that many others could relate. I always knew, even when I was struggling, that I was going to turn my own battle into something positive. I wanted to help others who were suffering the same battle as I. Now I have my LMSW and am a therapist specializing in

Eating Disorders. I strive to help others by sharing healthy coping strategies and working with individuals to uncover why they developed their own ED to begin with. I also have a blog called EDonEDS where I strive to inspire others by sharing what I have learned throughout my recovery. I’ve found a way to stand out while still being healthy. My mission is to help others find their own motivation to achieve their dreams and life goals.

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